Finding Love with Good Bar Ediquette
Proper Bar Etiquette Tips and Enlightenments
If you’re like most of us single 20-somethings (ok, maybe more like 30-somethings) you’re probably sick of the dating scene, but even more sick of the online dating scene (don’t let me get started on the creepy stories I have been told about dating sites and Tinder). So what is a single sucker supposed to do? Well, my suggestion? Go out and drink and just say “F*ck it”. Being single is a far cry better than dating anyway.
Ok, so maybe drinking isn’t the answer, but there is something to be said about going out and meeting people in person. There is also something to be said about the etiquette of drinking which may help you to meet some other decent people such as yourself…seeing as you are such a fine person.
How to find a good bar mate
Using good manners and etiquette is a good standard for any proper socialite and if you are out and about meeting people, make sure that you are not only a decent patron, but that you keep an eye out for other decent patrons. Here are some ways you can improve on your bar etiquette:
Tipping the render:
The minimum is a dollar per drink at least, but be generous; after all the bartenders and bouncers do have to put up with you.
Photos: Are you flashing too much?
If you’re the tool with the camera whose flash has been going off to such a degree that you’re giving seizures to drunk epileptics, you need to chill. Maybe put down the camera and enjoy the moment. You also might want to spend some time watching your drink. You’re at the bars and there are creeps (girls and guys) looking for someone not paying attention because they are too distracted taking duck-lip selfies with their equally schmammered friends.
If you have a crap ton of drinks you had planned on ordering for a group of hot chicks or friends, cool it with the specialty shots and settle on something simple with a soda back. The bartender already probably hates you, as do all the others waiting for you to take everyone’s order. Get your whiskey and get out.
Don’t ditch your drinking buddy
Are you a ditcher? Do you bail after two shots, forget where you went then somehow find your buddy again just to find you left them alone with strangers? You’re the worst. Don’t ditch your drinking buddies because they may need you, especially if it’s just the two of you. Make sure if you’re going to wander, your pals are in good company. Especially since you just happen to be the worst company. Hopefully your friends will soon learn not to go drinking alone with your wandering ass.
How to tell when you’re way too drunk
If you get an urge to climb on anything whether it be a stage, a building, on another human being or you find your usual rational fears begin to fade, you’re too drunk and you need to go home. In a cab. Don’t be a hero. Don’t think you can take on that buff dude because the reality is, whiskey does not make you stronger, it makes you dumber. So if you get the urge to fight, climb or make out against a wall in public, go home.
Actually meeting someone at the bars
Every so often, on those really rare and beautiful occasions you happen to stumble (maybe literally) upon someone who is legitimately cool. Awesome. But again, you’re at a bar and you met someone, so be wise. Have you observed their bar etiquette? Are their eyes wandering when they talk to you? Are they attempting to climb, punch or makeout with things? Have they been buying drinks but are being a douche about it? Have they already mentioned how their ex just walked into the bar and they seem either uncomfortable or heart broken? Does it seem they have wandered from the pack and are looking for something to take home? If you answered yes to any of those questions, run. Bar etiquette is key. Are they being kind socialites, or sleezy bar creeps? It’s not too hard to tell them apart.
Giving and getting numbers
You got some balls. You just met someone who has been following the etiquette (so far as your drunk eyes can see) and you have given out your number. Here’s the thing: if per chance you remember this moment the next day and the person who you’ve exchanged numbers with has not booty called you after you left the bars or sent you a text requesting naked pics, you might have dodged a bullet and have an opportunity to meet someone cool. If you do meet up, make sure you meet at a public place and make sure you tell your friends so they know where you’ll be. The person you met may have bar etiquette, but that doesn’t mean they’re not still bat crap crazy.
Did you pass the BAR?
So as you dodge and weave through the bars and past the drunkards and make your way to the only person standing up straight who looks like they are dying to have an interesting conversation with someone decently intelligent, make sure you’re a decent bar mate as well. Be a good patron and maybe you will attract another fellow patron as awesome and fun as you.
Article by: Kyleen – Read more of her silliness at Little Girl in a Big World